


Winter is Coming

by J_33



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Minor Spoilers, Multi, Pain, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-23
Updated: 2014-02-27
Packaged: 2018-01-13 13:24:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1228006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/J_33/pseuds/J_33
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"He's strong, he's fast, has a metal arm," says Steve.  "Most of the intelligence community doesn't believe he exists, the ones that do call him the Winter Soldier.  He's a ghost, you'll never find him," Natasha replies.  If only they knew he would find them first.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy

Darkness, shadows, demons, and blood haunted her dreams. She saw flashes of orange mixed with fire, and she heard screams coming out of every corner she turned, but no matter how fast she ran the screams only got louder and louder. All she felt was heart wrenching agony that seemed to strangle her body and to grow tighter with every struggle. 

There was a figure standing at the end of a secluded street covered in sparkling snow. It wasn’t the kind of snow that you want to build and snowman out of, it was the kind that you try to avoid because the cold is too much to bare. She slowly, but steadily made her journey towards the mysterious figure with the dim lights of the street lamps being her only source of guidance. The closer she got, the colder she felt, and the harder it seemed to get air to fuel her lungs. Though the snow was ice cold, her feet felt like they were walking on lava; every steps warning her to go back.

She was almost to the figure, but despite the short distance she was unable to identify who, or what this strange creature was. She wanted nothing more than to go back to the safe warmness awaiting her, but there were distant voices urging her to keep going. The voices got quieter with each step, but the pounding in her head grew heavier. As she approached the hooded figure, the snow falling from the dark sky above begun to fall so hard that you would think the clouds were trying to bury her alive.

Her heartbeat sped up as she reached a shaky hand across the now slim space that kept her from identifying the unknown figure. She could see her breath like smoke in the air, and her heavy winter coat that she was once wearing seemed to no longer be any use against the harsh weather. She slowly pulled the hood of the figure and was shocked of who was standing before her. 

Those dark eyes she would recognize anywhere, though his hair was longer than the last time she saw him. Despite those features it was the metal arm that gave him away. There before her stood the man that trained her, the man that she once trusted with her life, but he was no longer that man. His once warm chocolate eyes were now a harsh stone that punctured her heart like daggers, but she had to be sure it was him, that it was truly the Winter Soldier.

“James?” she sputtered out, barely audible against the roaring wind.

He didn’t respond. Instead he pulled out a match that stayed lit despite the conditions and dropped it. The snow that she was once standing on turned to oil, and as the match meant with the ground, it was like heaven and hell combined. She was encased by flames that ate at her skin with every growing second. Her screams came out as whispers, as her vision went dark. The last thing she saw was the metal arm through the heavy flames, and someone calling her name out in the distance as she used her last bit of strength to fight against the unknown force holding her down.

Natasha awoke in a heavy sweat to the worried eyes of Steve Rogers, who had his hand wrapped firmly wrapped around both of her arms, yelling her name. She felt uneasily warm, like she was back in that fire, and her head was pounding so hard she thought she was going to be sick. 

She jumped out of bed ignoring the growing dizziness, as she hurried to the bathroom and released the contents of her stomach into the toilet. She heard Steve run after her and felt him hold back her hair as she finished. Natasha then laid her still pounding head against the cold surface of the metal bathtub praying that it would make the pain go away. 

She looked up at Steve who was wearing a white undershirt, and red plaid pajama bottoms, his usually neat blond hair ruffled from sleep. He was looking at her with worry written plainly across his face. She opened her mouth to say something that would ease his worry, but immediately felt the room start to spin, so she simply patted the empty space next to her as a sign for him to sit down.

Steve was still worried, but he sat down next to Natasha, allowing her to lean her head on his shoulder as he rubbed her back. He didn’t ask her what was wrong because he knew that it was nightmares. She had been having those a lot lately, but this was by far the worst one. She never said what they were about, but he assumed they were about her past, about the Red Room. He so badly wanted to erase all those bad memories, to make her pain go away. He was Captain freaking America, and he couldn’t even protect her at times like this, but he could be there for her, and try to comfort her the best way he could, so that’s what he planned to do.

Natasha was feeling slightly better, but no matter what she did she could still feel an uneasiness growing in the pit of her stomach. 

“Do you trust me?” she asked, and it came out no more than a whisper.

“Of course I do,” he said trying to make it come out as a fact, instead of an opinion. “Why do you ask?” he said and despite the darkness that 3 o’clock in the morning will bring you, she could feel his eyes locked on hers.

“I-It’s nothing,” she said, but Steve could tell it was more.

He didn’t want to pry, so instead he leaned down closing the gap between them as he meant her soft pink lips with his. Natasha got lost in his touch for a moment, but the feeling deep in her gut came back, as she pulled away. 

“I taste like throw up,” she said so that he wouldn’t see the real problem.

“I’ve had worse,” he said causing them both to laugh.

She felt something in her chest expand every time he talked, every time he said something that made her feel like a women, not like some spy, but this time was different. This time she remembered why the voices that haunted her dreams told her never to get attached to someone, because you’ll just end up hurting them. 

Natasha knew she wasn’t meant for realationships, she wasn’t even meant to be loved, but here she was having everything that she once could only dream of, and now all that was on the line because winter is coming, and there’s nothing she can do about it.


	2. Mission to Moscow

Fury gave them their orders. The Black Widow and Captain America were going to Moscow to element a growing terrorist threat. It was nearing time to go, when Steve approached her. Lately she had been acting very strange. She was a spy, so of course she had secrets, but this was something else. It took him a while to break through all the walls that she set up to shield herself from getting hurt, and he wasn’t even done breaking all of them down yet, but he finally felt as though he was getting through to her. 

Most mornings when he woke up she was there next to him. Even some days when she had been out on a mission he’d wake up to find her in his bed, bruised and bandaged, but there. Sometimes she would even stay for breakfast. Though these last few days she had been acting so distant, even more than usual. She begun waking up extra early to get out of the door before him, avoiding him at work, taking more missions just to waste time, and anytime he asked her what was wrong she would play it off. He was finally happy after 70 years, he finally felt like he had a purpose, but now it seemed like everything was falling apart.

This mission though, this one was different. Normally Natasha wore a very stoic expression on her face while at work, making sure to observe, not be the thing that everyone’s looking at, but when Steve made eye contact with Natasha from across the room there seemed to be a panicked expression in her eyes. The mission was in Russia, her home country, and the last time they were there things didn’t exactly go as planned, but that wasn’t why she was acting this way right now.

Steve walked up to her after the briefing and asked her what was wrong.

“I’m fine really,” she said sounding slightly annoyed.

“Liar,’ said Steve, knowing that she wasn’t fine, that they weren’t fine.

There it was, the pain in her stomach again. Natasha didn’t know how much longer she could keep this a secret. She had gone to Fury, told him that something was off, and he believed her. The only problem was that he made her promise that she wouldn’t tell Steve anything because he could compromise the operation, he would compromise it. She wasn’t exactly lying, she just wasn’t telling Steve the whole truth, but either way it was killing her inside whether she was willing to admit it or not.

“Look, can we not do this here,” said Natasha trying not to make a scene. She was more comfortable hiding in the shadows then being out in exposed like this, and people were starting to stare.

“Natasha we’re partners, we’re a team, and whether you like it or not I deserve to know what’s wrong with you, because lately I have no idea,” he said in a frustrated tone.

“Steve- I…”  
“No! Enough will all the excuses. I know this is hard, I know it’s hard to care about someone, but I care about you, and for a while I thought that things were going great. Apparently I was mistaken because you don’t seem to give a damn anymore,” said Steve as he raised his voice in the process.

Natasha was about to say something in return but was interrupted by one of the pilots coming over, telling them it was time to board the plane. Deep down Natasha was thankful for the interruption; not wanting to continue this conversation here. 

The plane ride was long and awkward, and Natasha was dreading this particular mission because the nightmare she had a few weeks ago had happened in Moscow. She was only hoping that this didn’t end quite as badly.

Once they neared the location she watched as Steve jumped out of the plane without a parachute and she made a mental note to scold him about that later. Soon after she jumped out of the plane and landed not too far away from him. All they had to do was get in and get out without being noticed. Her job was to grab the hard-drive with the stolen government information on it, while Steve had to keep the target busy.

It was night time and boy was Moscow and pretty place to look at in the dark. The way all the buildings lit up, illuminating the cold, dark sky was beautiful, but Natasha wasn’t here to admire the view. She found it funny though, how despite living in Russia for half her life, not once did she ever stop and look at her surroundings, not like she was given the chance though. She shook her head, trying to rid herself of all those thoughts that haunted her dreams. She caught Steve looking at her out of the corner of her eye. Normally she would probably look back, nod her head maybe, but she was still pissed at him for causing a scene so she put her game face on; ready to get to work.

There was a guard tower in the center of the facility that they were infiltrating, so as long as she stayed away from that she would be fine, or at least she hoped so. With the com in her in her ear Natasha could hear Steve clearing each room.

She was nearing the room where the hard-drive should be. As she approached she noticed two guards standing in front of the only entrance. She snuck up behind them using there loud chattering as leverage and three punches and a drop kick later they were both down.

“Approaching the item, any news on your side Cap?’ she whispered into her com.

“Not yet,” Steve said in his serious Captain America voice.

A few short minuets later, right as Natasha snagged the hard-drive she heard gunfire begun to erupt over her com. 

“Dammit Steve,” she whispered to no one in particular.

She quickly made her way over to the check point where they were supposed to meet once she got the hard-drive, but Steve was nowhere in sight. The backup helicopter was there ready to take them back to base. The pilot was telling her to get on, that they had to leave now before they were spotted, but there was no way in Hell she was leaving Steve behind. She left the hard-drive with them before she went to got ‘rescue’ Steve.

The gunfire seemed to only get louder as Natasha got closer and closer to where Steve was last. She found him ducking behind a metal table. There was an empty gun on the floor next to him. She ducked down right beside him and tossed him her spare gun. 

He caught it easily but then said “What the hell are you doing here?”

“You’re welcome,” she said while firing rounds at the enemies. 

Steve did the same, and soon later the gunfire seemed to quiet down.

“We need to leave now!” said Natasha urgently, not wanting to waste any time. 

Steve nodded his head I agreement. Natasha stood up quickly making her do the door before Steve when more gunfire came out of nowhere. She felt a bullet get lodged into her right shoulder, as more grazed past her head. Running on adrenaline, and adrenaline only she ignored the pain as she and Steve made their way to the extraction point that was just about to leave without them. Just before Steve boarded the plane he looked back and noticed a familiar face amidst the smoke.

“Bucky?” he whispered under his breath, but it couldn’t be true; Bucky died ages ago.

They quickly boarded the helicopter, just as it took off. That’s when her adrenaline started to wear off, and the throbbing in her shoulder became stronger by the second. Steve not realizing anything was wrong until now rushed to her side. 

“Are you hit?” he asked, concern etched all over his face.

Natasha put her hand over the wound to slow down the bleeding. “It’s a through and through, probably just needs some stitches,” she said. She only wished that getting shot was her only problem, but it wasn’t, and Steve would find that out soon enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be posted tomorrow, s thanks for reading and don't forget to review


	3. Storms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter, but I just wanted to clear up that the pain in Natasha's stomach is guilt not a pregnancy. Sorry if I misled anyone:( Thanks for reading and don't forget to review!!!!!!!

It was almost 7pm and the thunderstorm outside was driving Natasha mad. She had been ordered to take a week off after getting shot, and she was starting to go stir crazy. It had only been two days but she couldn’t take just sitting here doing nothing. Her shoulder still hurt every time she lifted her right arm too high, but pain is the job, so why was she sitting in her small apartment while people were out there risking their lives.

If someone were to ask her why she was angry, sad, and tired all at once she would blame it on the pain medication, though that would be a lie. The truth was ever since being released from the infirmary, she and Steve hadn’t talked once. It was mostly his fault expecting her to tell him everything that was going on. She was a spy, she had secrets, she lived off of secrets, but there he was making it all about him. The more Natasha paced around her bedroom the more she wanted to punch something really hard, or stab it, or shoot it; she just had to do something.

She couldn’t put all the blame on Steve though because she had been acting different these past few weeks, and she knew it. The truth was she got happy. She got happy thinking about seeing Steve after work, maybe watching some old black and white film. Sometimes they didn’t even talk, they just sat there enjoying each other’s presence. She got happy knowing that whenever she had a rough mission, or a bad dream he would be there. She got happy with every small touch of gratitude, small word of kindness, and silent respect that he had to offer. The way when he hugged her after a long mission, and she could feel his heartbeat speed up a little faster, or the way he would wrap his arm around her waist when they would go on walks even though he knew that she could protect herself. She got happy when she woke up and there he was hogging more then half the bed, but she couldn’t get mad at him because she always took all the blanket. Lastly she got happy knowing that she wasn’t alone anymore. 

The one thing that she longed most in her life was right in front of her, but that was the very problem. She got happy, and for a while she was happy, but then she went soft. She forgot all the reason why she wasn’t meant to be happy, wasn’t meant to be with someone as loyal as him. Natasha would be okay with that, she could deal with spending the rest of her life trying to treat him as he did her, but she wasn’t that person. She was bossy, sneaky, a little crazy, mean sometimes, impatient, ambitious, and damaged. She wasn’t a hero like him, but he made her feel like one. Now here she was stabbing him in the back, keeping a secret from him that he has the right to know, but she couldn’t tell him.

She missed him, but again she deserved to feel this way didn’t she? With every kind gesture he made, there was a mistake that she made. With a person he saved, there was a life she destroyed, and in the process she was destroying his too. Burdening him with her past, her troubles while causing more for him all in the same day. Everyone she ever cared about got hurt, and she didn’t want to do that to Steve. She didn’t want him to just be another name on the list of people she dragged along for the ride of her messed up life. She had her fun, her chance at happiness, a chance she never thought she would get, but a chance doesn’t last forever. 

There was another loud crash of thunder that snapped Natasha out of her thoughts. She really hated the rain. She walked into her living room hoping to read a book that might help clear her head, but was interrupted by a knock at her door. She opened it and there standing in front of her was a soaking wet, in his worn out black leather jacket and tan cargo pants holding one Crown Imperial flower in his hand, Steve Rogers.

“It means power and mightiness,” he said referring to the flower.

“You’re so cheesy,” she said with a small laugh guiding him inside, but secretly she loved the gesture.

Natasha went to go get him a towel, and when she came back he was putting the flower in vase. Only Steve Rogers would put a flower in a vase right away.

“Look I was a real jerk before,” he started drying himself off, “And I just really want to make amends.”

“You’re just saying this cause I got shot,” she said with a grimace while smelling the flowers. 

“How is your shoulder by the way?” he asked.

“It’s been better.”

There was an awkward silence after that.

“I’m sorry,” Natasha said. “You’re just so…you, and your kind, and nice, and honest, and I’m none of those things. The more time I spent with you the more time I realized that you deserve better and….”

She was silenced by Steve’s lips meeting her own as she was boosted up onto the kitchen counter. The kiss was long a passionate; it had after all been two days since they saw each other last.

Needing air Natasha pulled back and said “Captain Rogers, you sure aren’t one to be very subtle,” with a seductive grin. 

“Well you know, the red, white, and blue isn’t exactly discreet,” he replied leaning in for another kiss.

Natasha knew that this was a mistake, that she should just tell him everything now to get it off her chest, but she was here and he was there, and he looked really good all wet and sparkly. So Natasha thought just for this night she’d allow herself to be happy one last time, ignoring the pain in her gut because the warmness in her heart was stronger. He got her flowers after all.


	4. Flowers

Flowers. They’re such a simple gesture, but they mean so much. They smell nice, look nice, and even mean something behind the whole red rose’s cliché, but they die eventually so what really is the point? Or maybe that is the point; because they will soon die, at least the short period that they smelt nice, looked pretty, and meant something wouldn’t be for nothing.

Natasha could see the tinted orange flowers through her bedroom door on the counter. They were nice, but right now they just reminded her of what she had to lose. 

The light was shining in from the slightly ajar curtains, and the clock read half past seven. Steve’s arms were wrapped around her waist, with his head in her red curls, the white sheets tangled between them, and she could feel slow pounding of his heart against her back that matched his steady breathing. 

It was early, and Natasha was tired but she couldn’t seem to silence the thoughts fighting like warriors in her head. She was warm and comfortable, but restless and she cursed herself for not being able to enjoy her time with him right now. 

Trying to calm her thoughts she began to observe the mess on her floor. Her pants were over there, his shirt was somewhere else, and who knew where his shoes ended up? Finally able to maybe close her eyes, and keep them shut, Natasha was interrupted by the buzzing of her phone on the bed side table.

She felt Steve begin to stir as she attempted to untangle herself from him in order to reach her phone, not having very good luck. 

“Don’t answer it,” Steve whispered into her hair as he kissed her neck. 

“It could be important,” she sighed turning to face him. 

“As important as this?” he said as he rolled on top of her small frame, and captured her lips with his.

Natasha caught off guard, but not at all disappointed, wrapped her arms around his broad torso, kissing him back with just as much intensity. Things were heating up as she let a moan escape her lips, forgetting what she was going to do before this, but then she heard her phone go off again, and again, and one more time before she frustratingly let go of Steve; plopping back down on the pillow, reaching for her phone. 

She unlocked her phone, noticing that she had two missed calls, and four text messages from Fury telling her to come into the office right away. There was no way that he was just inviting her for tea.

“Fury wants me to come in,” she stated.

“Do you have to go,” replied Steve, wearing a boyish pout on his face. 

“I’m afraid so,” she said laughing silently at his childish reaction. “But there’s some takeout in the fridge if you want any.”

“Why do you never have any regular food at your place?”

“Because your place has all the good food,” she said with a smirk, and as she turned to get out of bed he grabbed her wrists and pulled her in for one last kiss.

“Now you can go,” said Steve with that stupid accomplished grin on his face that she couldn’t seem to get enough.

Steve Rogers sure is something else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a little out of my comfort zone, and it's the first time I've ever wrote something like this. but I hope you all enjoyed.
> 
> Thanks for reading and REVIEW:)

**Author's Note:**

> I promised I would do a fic of my take of what may happen in Cap 2 so here it is. I know that in the real movie Natasha and Steve wont be in an established relationship, but in this they shall be because I am the boss. Anyways I have 40 days till the movie therefore 40 days to finish this. I can't promise how many updates a week cause my schedule is busy and school starts up again tomorrow, but I promise to work my hardest on this fic. I have an idea of where to go from this but just bear with me and I promise it will be worth it.
> 
> Thanks for reading and REVIEW:)


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